daddy boot camp
Christine and I attended a class at Babies ‘R’ Us for first-time dads. Titled “Daddy Boot Camp”, I didn’t really know what to expect. It was like participating in a game show. It was me against 5 other expectant fathers. First up was the diaper change contest. We faced off in pairs; I volunteered in the second round. I had to undress a baby doll, change his diaper, and dress him again. The doll had on a button-down shirt, a sweater vest, and khaki pants. We were reminded to pretend this was a real baby. I tried to be as gentle as I could, but I had difficulty getting the shirt and sweater off. Then I failed to have the diaper ready; I held the baby’s legs up in the air with one hand while I tried in vain to open up the diaper. Once I got the diaper open and on the baby, I struggled to put the shirt and sweater back on; a real baby would have been screaming bloody murder. Somehow, I finished first in my face-off, and the instructor selected me as “most charismatic dad” for being gentle and caring throughout the process (I was awarded a box of diapers).
Next, we had to drink 2 oz. of water out of a baby bottle. Half of the group had difficulty because their bottles leaked. I had no problems drinking a drop at a time, and I thought I was making good progress, but Christine noted I had a long way to go. This activity taught us that if the baby is having difficulty drinking from the bottle, the nipple is too small. It’s too big if it spills all over the baby’s face.
The next challenge put Dad in a situation where Mom isn’t home, and Dad has to leave the house (for work or whatever). We had to pack up a diaper bag by selecting items throughout the store in 7 minutes. The items had to be necessities for the baby, and I could not ask Mom, and Mom could not help me. After we collected our items and stuffed them in the diaper bag (they had to be in the bag), we returned to take inventory. Christine noted that the other dads had their bags overflowing; mine was zipped closed when I returned, so CL felt I didn’t get everything. Sure enough, I fell short. We had to have diapers, wipes, a toy, a bottle, a bib, a binky, a burp cloth (or in my case, washcloths), a change of clothes, a blanket, and diaper rash ointment. I didn’t have the last 3 items. I did have lotion, 2 jars of baby food, a spoon, and baby rub (which I mistook for ointment; it was more like Vick’s Vapo Rub for babies).
The final challenge was to disassemble a pack-and-play (playpen), pack it up, then unpack it and reassemble it. We couldn’t have a demonstration, we couldn’t use instructions, and we couldn’t have any help (at least not until the instructors realized we could be there all night and the dads might end up breaking the pack-and-play’s). I usually don’t do any type of assembly unless I have the instructions, so I felt discouraged from the get-go. Nonetheless, it was a fun excursion as all the dads struggled, the instructors yelled in vain to keep us from damaging the merchandise, and the moms laughed at our mishaps.
All in all, it was a very fun night, and I learned the proper way to change a diaper, about changing nipple sizes on a bottle, what necessities are needed in a diaper bag, how to assemble/disassemble a pack-and-play, and about giving baby a bath (thankfully, this was just a demo). Christine and I had a good time, and the only regret was the fact that neither of us brought a camera to capture the night’s events.
